by Morton Patterson
Graeme has worked in the same role for the past 15 years. He is technical, creative and very conscientious, and has been instrumental in creating an application that will transform the way in which his organisation delivers a core aspect of their business. This change will automate what is a hugely labor-intensive operation and will impact how they do business in the future. It will also mean that certain roles will no longer be needed.
What Graeme is not aware of, however, is his value; he lacks the confidence and awareness of the crucial role he has played in developing the new system and the impact it will have on the company’s future.
Knowing Your Value is an emotional subject, and when I ask this question people are often confused as to how to answer. It is easy to identify when you don’t feel valued, respected, or appreciated, but knowing your value is somewhat different.
But what exactly is knowing your value? Is it having a positive self-esteem? Is it knowing your worth and being able to identify all of your positive qualities? I’m not sure.
In my view, knowing your value and self-worth are inextricably linked. Self-worth is defined as “the sense of one’s own value or worth as a person.” I think that is one part of it, but the other aspect is being able to understand how much of a difference you have made in any given situation with the contribution you have made.
Over dinner recently, I asked my partner: Do you know your value in this relationship? She initially said no. But when we talked it through, and I highlighted a number of situations where her presence made a significant difference, she could then see her value.
In this short piece, I would like to outline seven things that can indicate you know your value:
Self-Worth Value #1: You have positive self-esteem.
You believe in and like yourself. Self-esteem is confidence in one’s own worth or abilities. You are comfortable with who you are — your weight, height, and everything that makes and represents you. You are confident in the work you deliver and your sense of professionalism. You like and have a great relationship with people. I think that without positive self-esteem it would be difficult to know your value.
Self-Worth Value #2: You recognise the difference you make.
When you know your value, you will confidently approach a negotiation with full belief in your knowledge, skills, and experience and the difference you can make. For example if you help a client introduce a new process within their organisation, you are not too consumed by the process used but in how much they have benefited. Have they had an increase in sales or productivity or have they saved money? Or it might be that you’re the main carer for a disabled or elderly relative and your presence and support is invaluable.
Self-Worth Value #3: You see yourself as a peer.
In any given situation, knowing your value means feeling that you are an equal with anyone you interact with: clients, bosses, colleagues, or friends. You are not a supplicant. Nor do you feel privileged to be with someone or to work in a particular type of organisation. You have a personal sense of value and deservedness and assert yourself as an equal in personal and business relationships.
Self-Worth Value #4: You do not undercharge for your services.
Quite often out of fear of losing business or the desire to win more business, people will undercharge for their services. This is a classic situation where they end up doing much more than they’re paid to do. But, somehow, in a desire to prove themselves, these people still feel that they are not doing enough in relation to how much they are being paid. This can set a precedent which could be hard to remove. I recall many years ago driving to a client site and deep inside I was unhappy and annoyed. This was because I was hugely undercharging and unhappy with myself for continually doing so.
Self-Worth Value #5:You are clear about your values.
You know your boundaries. You are clear about what is acceptable behavior, how you like to be treated and spoken to, and you have the courage to speak out when necessary. You don’t need external validation to prove your value — instead, you have an internal compass of what is right and wrong.
Read on to find out more about core values and how to find our values.
Self-Worth Value #6: You are engaged in work that is exciting and fulfilling.
When you are involved in work that is fulfilling as well as financially rewarding, you are more inclined to work with even greater commitment. I believe that when you love what you do, you are prepared to do more and to become more.
The primary function of leadership is to nurture culture through values. Learn more about Values & Culture during a Management 3.0 Foundation Workshop.
15 thoughts on "Seven Signs You Know Your Value and Self-Worth"
Quite inspiring have used other ways of making myself feel valued in the workplace as well as the home life relationships but the relationships failed as a product of partner asking how the day went , ultimately unloading at times as well as sometimes saying nothing. Holding it in was a way to cope not knowing how much it can destroy what we had as partner I guess. Leaving out little things also in a relationship breaks the parters spirit.
Hello. I’m just curious. Sometimes I find it hard to distinguish between being entitled or being assertive of your self worth. There are situations where I don’t know what to do, either I do this because it is in lined with my worth or compromise and meet half way for the sake of your relationship with the person. I hope you can write back to my email because i’m really concerned about this and this has been my struggle the entire time i’ve been self discovering.
Wow, this has been very insightful! I feel I have lost myself during life’s rough patches. On a journey to find myself and put my life back in order. I know it starts with me.
I love it ..fine tunes how I really feel about myself,yet gives me areas to strengthen on..
I loved this article!!!! Great insight on value of self!
I think that is all good. I do believe that the most important thing about knowing your value is that its used not just to benefit myself others also. Otherwise it becomes self indulgence.
Very encouraging and motivating tres bien mes Amis bisoux bisoux a vous Haha
I came hear to understand how to know my self worth because I think I’m confused and most if not everything you’ve mentioned reminds me of an experience I’ve bin through
Thanks for being hear so I could listen to what you have to say!
This definitely helped me reevaluate a lot of behaviors and starting to know my value as a woman. It is a process and I’m ready to start! Thank you for this!
Wow,am really bless here!! Sometime i allow fear to take over me and at the same time i do have confident and valve,in a sense that when am over thinking about something that has hurt me i speak to myself marvellous you are strong don’t let this bring you down wipe your eyes and laugh Immediately you will see me smiling and i have learn to value myself by not allowing fear take over me.
So true!! As hard as it is us women need to learn to walk away from situations that don’t build us up. Just do the right thing!@
This is a great article. I need to take this on board as I find that I am in a work situation where my I have to for my self esteem and worth. I now work with a younger team who are given a lot of support whereas I receive criticism and no support. I will be looking for another job as even though I stand up for myself and recognise what I do I doin’t think I am valued.
Great short article to read before an interview (2nd round).
Thank you for the pep talk. 💙
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